Talk with Stephanie

I talked with Stephanie for a while when she dropped Harmony off this evening.  She's as worried about Billy's situation as I am.  She desperately wants him back in Indy.  She's concerned about what's going to happen with him not having somewhere to live.  There are just so many variables to this problem.  I don't even know where to start.

Billy is an alcoholic.  He needs to be in rehab or at least involved in AA.  I don't know what court is going to do with him, but he's been indicating to Stephanie that he thinks that he'll be able to get out of the jail time.  I really don't think that's going to happen.  He mentioned something to her about maybe being able to come back with us when we come home after Memorial Day weekend.  I don't know...

I'm so scared for him.  I'm also scared for Harmony.  In talking with Stephanie, we were voicing our real fears.  She is afraid that he'll disappear.  I'm afraid that he'll die.  I can't help but think that it's time for tough love.  It's time for him to face the consequences of his actions and figure out how to get himself out of the mess that he's gotten himself into.  No one has helped him lose his job and get arrested.  Are we doing him a disservice by even considering trying to take the burden of the consequences off of his shoulders?  What if the next time the police officer does shoot him instead of tasing him?  How would I feel about helping him then?

I feel like there is no win in this situation.  I love that kid with all of my heart.  Mom was talking with me the other day and stated that I've always had a soft spot in my heart for Billy.  It's true.  I've always wanted to help him, to fix him, to make everything better and to take all of the pain away.  I see the damage that Traci has caused and I just want to erase all of that from his heart and his mind.  But, at this point in his life, Billy has to do this for himself.  I can be there to love him and support him, but the work has to come from him.  It's just so hard to stand by and watch him hurt.  It breaks my heart.